Status Quo; After so many years

Wow, hi guys!

How long has it been since i last blogged? Amazed that this blog is still around after so many years. Read thru all my old blogposts and was kinda reminiscing the feelings i felt when i was typing them.

I have grown into one fine lady, with a stable job and a lovely boyfriend!

Back to what i believe - God will never take anything from you without giving you so much better! Always stay positive and things will just fall into place, and embrace the change.

I hope i can blog regularly, pinning down my thoughts here which will not disappear and serve it as a memory for the future. Isn't too bad to blog, is it? However, if you want to follow my (more) frequent updates, you can do so at my instagram handle - @chiendol_

See you! xx

Alone time

Because curiosity consumed her, she wanted to know his past without asking him. And now, she is drowning. 2 steps forward, 1 step back. Maybe he just need to grab her hand, pull her to him and tell her, "Everything will be alright."

Before she starts pushing people away again, save her.

Thoughtless

"What if I don’t choose you, Kellan? What will you do?”

He looked away, a tear rolling down his cheek. “I’ll leave, Kiera. I’ll leave, and you and Denny can have your happily ever after.” He looked back at me. “You wouldn’t even need to tell him about me. Eventually, the two of you…” his voice broke and another tear fell on his cheek, “the two of you would get married, and have children, and have a great life.”

I fought back a sob. “And you? What happens to you in that scenario?”

“I…get by. And I miss you, every day,” he whispered."

S.C. Stephens

Let's go back to 3 weeks ago

Oh, it's back to square one. Friends told me to fight for something which/someone who i want. But how to when i'm at a losing end? Just have to suck thumb and move along.

Some people may appear to be bubbly and wild when they are outside, but they may be a total opposite when they are home or alone. The graph of their emotions can vary to the extremes, not that they are bipolar. Would you prefer someone who has varied emotions or someone who is constant?

I guess i need constant in my life. And you will never know those words are for you.

Now, i just have to appear to be someone whom i acted so well all along.

她说

你要知道，她是一个曾今被爱情伤得很深的女孩。她缺乏自信心，她对爱情充满了怀疑，她的心再受不了打击。当她对一个人有好感时，她会慢慢的变主动。可是当她察觉有什么不妥时，她一定会选者放弃。因为她怕，真的很怕。她怕事情不会跟她想象的一样，有一样的结局。她宁愿什么也不开始，那她也不会陷了太深，就当一切没发生过。

Advantageous

Recently, i have come to senses, or rather i have accepted the fact that one will flock to people who are advantageous to him/her. I mean, this is what the world is like right and it's like a matter of course. If you can gain something out from that someone, why not?

Although it's not wrong and a matter of right, i can't bring myself to do that. Partially it's due to the lesson learnt in the past. Perhaps i just don't want to trouble the person out of courtesy.

I always have this thought that ran through my mind, "if you're capable, do it yourself."

Or, am i too strict to myself? Or do i have too high of an expectation for you?

"I've always think of and for you, couldn't you once think of and for me?"

50 shades of bluey Monday

Today's mood: Down and under

I'm practically dragging myself to work today. Never felt as gloomy before. This thought struck me while i'm on the way to work..."do i really like whatever i am doing now?"

Administration? No.

Sales/wholesales? Not really either.

Marketing? Most prolly yes.

Bum around? Oh hell yeah!

Sighpie.