What about travelling light?

Life's really pretty like a mess now, not to be seen, but rather, all inside me.

A burden too immense to embrace and too heavy to carry,

it's engulfing my little soul and I can't seem to subsist.

xx

Hop hop

Would like to own one of these one day, if I'm able to find them in the first place!

 A lil' something for days like these when I spend the day at home, just surfing the nets and finding my thoughts on the world wide web.

xx

Embrace the uncertainty

If you're feeling frightened about what comes next, don't be. Embrace the uncertainty. Allow it to lead you places. Be brave as it challenges you to exercise both your heart and your mind as you create your own path towards happiness, don't waste time with regrets. Spin wildly into your next action. Enjoy the present, each moment, as it comes; because you'll never get another one quite like it. And if you should ever look up and find yourself lost, simply take a breath and start over. Retrace your steps and go back to the purest place in your heart where hope lives. You'll find your way again.

 - Everwood

Privy

 

That smile

xx

Grateful

It's been quite some time now ever since the story ended and here I am typing down how my life actually changed during this period of time.

First 2 months was indeed the most terrible, torturous, horrible months I ever had in my life. Losing someone once so dear to you, someone whom you think you can share your life with, someone whom you think you can build your house with, and suddenly hes gone for good. Questions left unanswered, and they prevented me from breaking loose to the new world. So, I'm stuck within the little dark circle created by myself. I didn't know who am i any more.

Gradually, by the next few months, I'm used to being alone. Friends who stood by me was there, but I realised...most of my friends were gone. I didn't hang out with my friends when I was with him. Negligence, a painful lesson learnt. Reflecting on myself, what did I do wrong, what did I say which was simply immature, what do I need to change to be a better me? No one tells me the answers, I need to figure them out myself, no one knows better than I am I guess.

Hanging out with friends more often, meeting new people along the way, talking to my folks, figuring out the answers to myself...and finally I could picture everything in my mind. How immature, wilful, stubborn and thoughtless I used to be. Killed the pride whenever his friends were around, bad-tempered attitude little brat I was to him. Everything has a limit and that everything really exceeded his limit, it exploded. I do not blame him for that, I would blame myself for my lousy attitude to him which caused everything. I know I have my wrongs, and I'm fixing them. Thank you for letting me realise my shortcomings.

This relationship is not wasteful at all, I learnt a lot throughout. Be it what to do during a relationship, how should I behave, what are the things which are a no-no to do... In fact, it changed me entirely. A lesson which I will not forget.

"God will never take anything away from you without giving you something so much better."

I have a lot to take back through this experience of a broken relationship. I would say I'm happy with my life now. No more emo nemo moments, but of course...memories are meant to be kept and sometimes they will still pop out in my mind. Memories are served as a reminder too, remind me to be a better person and not to commit the same mistakes again.

For now, all I need to get back are the Little Miss Faith and Little Miss Courage who got lost in midst of the chaos in me. No tears of sorrow should be shed again, but if I do, I know there will be a shoulder for me to cry on. xx